Email/Message Fun!!

Alright, so a friend of mine showed me a fun way to mess with your friends over the internet when you're bored, So I thought I'd share it with you:

Dear Major Willy,

I don't really know how to say this, but I'm in love with your cat. I think I realized it when When I saw the purple monkey At the mental hospital and I saw you hit on the catholic priest. I'm sure you're man enough to understand that your driving sucks. I'm returning your nose hair clippers to you, but I'll keep your left ear as a memory. You should also know that I Gave my confession today about the moose poaching and You ruined my attempts at another world war.

Best of luck on the sex-change,
Kaaraa.

 

Dear Foxy,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but Our romance is over. I think I realized it When I tripped on peanut butter, Under the bus and I saw you drive over My father.
I'm sure you're Man enough to understand That there is no solution to you being a dumb kid
I'm returning Your love letters to me back to you, but I'll keep Your collection of butterflies as a memory.
You should also know that I Told my psychiatrist about the bruises and Our friendship is ruined

Please don’t hurt me,
Kurai

 

Dear KuraiKozo,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but You're a pervert. I think I realized it That night you picked your nose At the Elton John concert and I saw you Carve your initials into My father.
I'm sure you're Senile enough to understand How awful you are.
I'm returning Your toe ring to you, but I'll keep Your mom as a memory.
You should also know that I Told my psychiatrist about the bruises and You ruined my attempts at another world war.

Greetings to your frog Leonard,
EonMaster

 

Dear Kylo,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I’m joining the Convent. I think I realized it when I quoted Forest Gump, under the bus and I saw you ignore my kneecaps.
I'm sure you're frostbitten enough to understand that Santa doesn't exist.
I'm returning our matching Snoopy underwear to you, but I'll keep the results of the blood test as a memory.
You should also know that I told my psychiatrist about the bruises and your Cucumber-fetishism is weird

Warm tingly sensations,
Josho

FFFFFFFFFFF

 

Josho? Is that your real name?

 

Dear Gasmaskguy,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I dislike your eyelashes. I think I realized it last year when you peed your pants, at the mental hospital and I saw you pull the clothes off the Catholic Priest.
I'm sure you're frostbitten enough to understand that there is no solution to you being a dumbkid.
I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep your collection of butterflies as a memory.
You should also know that I get sick when I think of your feet and you ruined my attempts at another world war.

Best of luck on the sex-change,
Meee

 

Nope, it's my band nickname.

There's Josho (Me), Kylo (Guitarist+Bro), Ando (Singer, best friend, possibly gay), and Blinx (Drummer)


And Meee's makes scary amounts of sense.

 

Dear Forums,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I’m joining the Convent. I think I realized it When your dog humped my leg, outside of your office and I saw you sit on My salt-beef bucket. I'm sure you're sly enough to understand that you need a sex change. I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep Your photo with the moustache drawn on it as a memory. You should also know that I hate your cooking and our friendship is ruined.

Please dopn't hurt me,
BoP
=====
Good thing I changed my clothes or the second sentence would be "...carve your initials into my kneecaps"

 

Why would I write such an important letter that wouldn't make sense?:wacko:

 

:laugh:

 

i liked Phoe's. Best. Ever. xD

 

Dear KuraiKozo,

I don't really know how to say this, but our affair is over. I think I realized it when When When we skinny dipped in the bathtub In your apartment and I saw you ignore my father. I'm sure you're frostbitten enough to understand How awful you are. I'm returning your your love letters to me to you, but I'll keep your mom as a memory. You should also know that Always wanted to break your legs and Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird.

With tears of sadness,
Ramses



that made an odd amount of sense, except the mom part
and i'd rather go to france then japan because my dad makes the schedule and he is only interested in old stones

 

aww drie, don't let the affair be over, i can change my cucumber fetish D;

 

I called dibs on Kurai's mom first, you wait your turn buddy!

 

stop it, i saw her first >: (

 

LIES! I saw her at least 3 years before you did!

 

D: cheater!

 

Dear Meee,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but our romance is over. I think I realized it that night you picked your nose, under the bus and I saw you ignore my boyfriend.
I'm sure you're man enough to understand that I may pee my pants.
I'm returning your car to you, but I'll keep my common sense as a memory.
You should also know that I gave my confession today about the moose poaching and I'm scratching my ass as you read this.

Kiss my butt,
Gasmaskguy~

 

We're onto something here...

 

Dear ijffdrie,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but our socks don't match. I think I realized it when your dwarf bit me, at the mental hospital and I saw you ignore the Catholic Priest.
I'm sure you're cowardly enough to understand that you need a sex-change.
I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep your left ear as a memory.
You should also know that I will try to forget that you broke my heart and I will haunt you when I’m incarnated as an Eskimo.

You make me sick,
Light