This story has 3009 words, thus exceeding the word limit. That would be a minus on my part. But the story is exciting and is probably great as a movie, but I wasn't content about the ending, I don't even know what happened at the ending.
I just did a word count and your right, but I think the word count includes the ' * ' in the count and I don't think they are really words. So that would mean the story has 3000 words. I think the story is a bit rushed at the end as well. Maybe the beginning should have been cut down so more detail could have been put into the end or maybe it would work better if the word cap were higher. Overall, good but probably could have been better. Also, it is very hard to read unless you use the Word file. If you can't open word files, good luck to you reading through that wall of text.
i always think the end is the most important part of a story, most stories start well, but have a crappy end, like lord of the rings, or the book marrow, i just value the end of a story highly
good story - the tension could've been amplified a bit I suppose - but it was done quite well - the ending felt a bit rushed, but I'm sure the word limit got in the way... I'll prolly be voting for this
I get a great sense for the characters. The dialog is amusing where appropriate. The scene is described in just enough detail to allow the reader to visualize it. The wording used is precise and far from mundane. I greatly appreciate the added word doc to keep formating intact. There is a definite sense of apprehension. The combat is written incredibly well. The last line really made me laugh my ass off. Great way to teach a basic rule of SC. I think I noticed 2 grammatical/spelling errors. I was far too drawn in to remember what they were now. This is my clear favorite thus far. After reading what others wrote: I understood the ending just fine first read through. I thought it was clever and unexpected. Again, I love that final line. I think one thing adding to the confusion is you wrote: "It was passed them in an instant." should be "past them" Again I'd let that simple a mistake slid. It's one of very few in a damn good piece of fan fiction.
This is, imo, by far the best story posted! No complaints except some spelling mistakes here and there. Simply great!
Thanks for the compliments and helpful critiques. I'll be editing this to add a little more depth to it and a bit more action. I omitted quite a bit of character developement and details about why an insane dark templar is on a Terran battle cruiser. The end also won't be nearly so rushed. If only he word limit had been higher; 5000 would have been just about perfect for this story.
