Whether you're rich or poor, cool or not, all people have one thing in common whether they be adopted or with one parent, or a family, or maybe even their other relatives. And unless you're one of the main characters from any said Final Fantasy game you've most likely talked to them or had a discussion with them at LEAST once. No matter how old you are, whether you be as young as karlo or as old as Remy and are yourself becoming a parent, it's obvious some things are still the same. Because this is a discussion, I've decided not to just rant, but offer other people the opportunity to rant about their 'Rents (or parents, if you're not slang savvy). Anyway! I know all adults come in varying shades of gray, from very dark gray to very light gray. Well, that's not fair, I know some pretty cool adults and my parents can be cool, too. But I mostly wanted to bring up some key factors. Maybe it's because I'm a girl, but these things I have noticed about my creators, and quite frankly is angers me. 1. Overprotective. I don't know how many other kids have to deal with this. I know a fair bit of kids who could drive a raging vehicle into a swamp and their parents would be gung ho about the whole affair. But, for mine, this is not the case. Unlike 'normal adults', my parents feel this odd need to regulate my life. If I so much as vanish for more than a minute they become quite angry and cross examine me about every piece of information on where I've been or done. I'm not allowed to go to parties without parents being there, even if it's ALL girls. I mean seriously, what am I going to do with other girls? Laugh at that if you want, yes, it's very amusing. Anyway, I was at my friend's house, all girls, no parents. We were playing Rockband and generally acting like three year olds. Well, my dad called and I couldn't prove they were there, because obviously they weren't. My dad made a big deal about it, and I suck with phones, I didn't know how to turn it down so all my friends heard his rant about it. On the basis, I'm not allowed to leave my house. It's like house arrest, only I'm not cowering in the corner trying to gnaw the tracking device off. 2. This brings me to my NEXT point. Why do parents have to be so dang...nosy? I mean, I know there are kids who would KILL for their parents to pay more attention to them, and I get it. I like it, too. but there's a point where it's nice and makes you happy and a point when the 'care' is equivalent to a bucket of soap and your head is pushed in so you find yourself drowning in the bitter taste of it all. I mean, anytime I talk to someone 'Who was that?' And I mean, I can't do anything without them sticking their noses into it. And if I say I was talking, it's what about and they get pissy when I don't tell them. It's none of their business as long as I'm not doing anything, immoral, or illegal. And I've NEVER done anything wrong, so I feel I should earn some right to personal space and comfortable breathing room without being cross examined under a light after I do something. 3. On to the next enhancing point! TRUST they give me. Or lack thereof. I mean, the worst I ever do was steal food from the fridge when I was younger and lie about it. But really, that's the worst I've done. I don't go out doing drugs or killing puppies. I've never been arrested for stealing shiz, I don't set things on fire. Really, I am just proven guilty, without a chance to redeem myself. Because I am not a legal adult, this my view is OBVIOUSLY wrong and I'm a delinquent. One who needs to be thrown into jail before trial. Thanks democratic system! *thumbs up* Too bad it doesn't apply to my house. The day I get the benefit of the doubt is the day I begin to look sexy in society's eyes. 4. Ofc (Of course, for all the TXTSPK challenged, not that there's anything wrong with that, because reading U for you and l8r for later etc. gets annoying after awhile) that's not all that's up. They are also FILTHY LIARS. As opposed to clean ones, am i right? hypocrites of the trade, and worse I can't call them out because then I get yelled at and told all I do is argue and act out and act like a delinquent. They tell me not to worry about what other people think of me, then get their skin in a bunch when I don't get all dressed up to go out in 'Public.' You know, that place where other people live? I know, it scared me at first, too, just try to stay calm, it's alright. I mean, they said it's so people don't think I'm a bum . WTF right? Who the hell am I trying to impress, the bum on the street corner? this is only one example, there's a hundred more. In Conclusion, parents often do stupid things because they believe they're doing what's best for their kid. Though where they get the stuff I'm unsure. There's a thing as 'going too far' and this is clearly and example of it, though I'm sure some people are worse off, like my friend whose parents check her internet history and all her files. But, still, why do they become this way? Do they just reflect their parents? Do they act according to how they think people should behave? Does it feed their need to be in charge? Or is it out of actual care? So anyway, there's my point. My main point was to see if all your parents are like this, to a level, as well. I'm certain I'm not the only one. don't get me wrong, my parents are cool, but really, some stuff is just ridiculous. What are your parents like?
i live with my mum now, shes pretty cool with the whole trust thing, although she hates my hair. My dad used to interrogate me about where i'd been when i'd been out, the thing is i actually was out doing drugs .
Parents exist. They did their rather disgusting acts to create us. And our permanent scar (the belly button) is our life long reminder of this. That's if they don't use modern technology to intervene.
1. No matter how unbelievable it is, they "protect" you for your own good. Or rather, what they percive is good for you. Some may be more conservative and strict than others of course. Some even know they are worrying too much, but they can't help it, they're worried for you. I can't really say anything that might convince you to change your viewpoint, but I bet when you become a parent yourself, you'll see how hard it is to choose between letting you have some fun and they're worries about your safety. What could happen on an all girls party? Alcohol, smoking, drugs, not-really-all-girls, to name a few. 2. Again, they worry about you. How would they know you have never done anything wrong if they don't ask? Even if they do, how do they know you're telling the truth? It's obvious that most kids wouldn't tell if they did, especially if you're not on very good terms with them. That's why they want to keep an eye on you as much as they can, to ensure you're fine. Sure, many parents may be going too far with surveilence, but they do it in good faith. The party you speak of in 1) ? You didn't tell them you're going to a party with no parents, so you lied to them. You couldn't tell them of course, but you're not going to win that. In this case it's either staying or a gamble wether they find out 3. The only example you gave here is you stealing food and lying about a party, so can't really say much about this one. The fact is, you do one thing wrong to betray trust, you must do a hundred to gain it back, it's not just parents. 4. I don't recall being told not to worry what others think really. I have been told not to look like a bum though. Actually, I've been told straight that how I look/behave has impact on how people see my parents. They're expected to teach me how to operate in society, so if something's wrong with me, so is with them. Now I don't really care about those other people, but I'm not about to let them talk down my parents Oh and the lying thing? They're trying to teach me that at times. Best example is "if someone calls, I'm not home/in the bath etc" It's not just excuse, it's a lie. They know it and I know it, but it's just so damn convinient, innit? Ok, I'll try to go sentence by sentence here. Agreed, that's what their belief is. Trail and error I believe, they were kids too and know some things kids tend to do that aren't good. Yes, sadly there is such thing as going too far, though I guess I'm on lucky side here. Change of perspective, they grow up and start relizing the mistakes they've made as kids and that listening to their parents in some cases would've been good for them. Possibly, they have to learn from somewhere... How else would they act; some may be more strict others less, but they do it in good faith. Depends, for some parents I believe it does, but not all. Most of the time, yes. You have to remember that your parents lived different lives, in different times. Especially, if they take example from theirs, they might seem "old fashioned" and some of their methods outdated. The problem here is to get a compromise between the two visions. Also bear in mind that no school or course can teach them how to raise kids well and no, they don't magically gain knowledge of that when they trun into adults (that's also not a change made in one day). They try their best using what they have - experience with their own and others' parents, intuition etc. It's just as hard for them as it is for you. Sometimes even harder. Man, I wish I had any grounds whatsoever for saying any of this ^^
I have to ask: are any of you actually parents yourselves? Perhaps it would give a great deal of perspective on the issue if you had experienced the parent issue from both sides. The original post seemed pretty typical; every teenager and young adult thinks the same thing. But wait until you're a parent and your mind may change a bit about some of those points.
1. Meee, that's why I'm not having kids =P But really, I've never given them any reason not to trust me. My parents know all the kids and agree they're 'good kids' but yet they still lock me away in this basement. And when I try to tell them they're worrying too much they have a giant fit and go on about how would I feel if they didn't care at all. I never asked for that, I just want them to loosen the shackles a little bit. 2. I know, I was hoping to win the gamble ;3 But the only reason I lied is because they were too protective to let me go, anyway! It was revenge. And yes, many parents go too far with it. And I think I have proven I'm trustworthy. I've lived for 16 years without doing anything incredibly awful, shouldn't tat be enough proof for them? 3. I know it's not just parents. But Meee, I quite made up for the stealing food thing. And the only reason I went to that party is because there's this thing called 'fun' my parents never allow me to have. Obviously they weren't going to let me go, even though the house was literally half a mile away. It's jsut I've never had it, despite my disposition, so might as well do things before I miss all my chances to be a teenager. I think they should be grateful I'm not distant and pissy like other teens. Yet this seems to encourage them to breathe down my neck. 4. Well I don't think my parents have really earned the right to my respect in that light. I love them, of course. But all they have done is lie to me and duel wield me with double edged sword. It's always about them, it's not about me. in the end they want to make themselves look good. And yeah, I've been blatantly told I should act more like a lady. Apparently, I don't, and it looks 'bad'. Actually, there's classes in my school called 'Parenting skills' =P And I know, I'm not hating on parents, I think they do a well enough job, I just get frustrated with them sometimes. Yes, they learn it from other adults. I wish they would try new things with their kids instead of become so set on their views being right and using every mean possible to make themselves look good.
It's 'dual'. You don't wield duels. Unless you do, in which case tell me how. I'm aware that there are such courses, I think they do these in churches too (though it may be more on marriage in general), but I don't believe it's worth much. Sure always nice to learn some basics, but there's just so much more these couldn't cover. I can't (and wouldn't bother anyway ) go and tell your parents to let their kids be kids sadly. You could try do it yourself, buuut... yeah I really shouldn't be going there... with my experience, well, I'm not the best example >.> Otherwise be happy that you're not a spoiled brat and try to be a kid despite them. You're going to regret it if you don't. Probably kinda late for that though.
sorry for my spelling error, it's morning, don't demand a lot from me XP yeah, i've treid asking Meee, it was a bad idea xD and yeah, so many regrets. I should have done more, it woudl have given my parents a reason not to trust me at least. And yeah, i wish i would have done some things, but obviously i haven't been able to do the,. As you said, making the most of what i have ;3
Of course. they understand me when i talk to them about stuff, they have a lot of time for me, they know a lot, they are always willing to listen to me, they give me rides to stuff when i need it. etc
My parents are smart and logical. I can convince them that what i am doing is indeed logical and for the greater good and they will accept within reason. parent problems? hah.
Maybe you can talk to them about trust and all if they are willing to listen... (e.g.) But dad, im old enough to go the party... no there wont be alcohol.... much...
I think you folks need to invest in a classic CD that will reinforce your belief that "there's no need to argue, parents just don't understand". You'll also learn how the girls of the world ain't nothing but trouble and how to boom shake shake shake the room.
Boys have it alot easier then girls. I don't get nearly as protected as my sister ever did. My parents always had trust in me and let me do alot of things as long as they knew it was pretty safe. Although something that always pisses me off is that parents always win in any argument even when the child is right!
